If it's not a spectrum disorder. . .

Or NVLD then what is it that could be going on with me?

Unfortunately I have a difficult time stepping out of my current situation and the difficulties I am going through cloud my judgment considerably.
I do want to be objective as possible if I was to obtain a psychological/neurological evaluation by a psychologist.

I've looked into personality disorders such as schizoid personality disorder and Obsessive Compulsive disorder (which fits me to a T) and they are something that I could be diagnosed with should I be evaluated. Either way it is important for me to get seen by a professional and get any therapy, help, (or conformation that I am perhaps the worse hypochondriac in the world?) or "piece of mind", as one may put it.

I took some on-line quizzes (not exactly accurate, I know) out of curiosity and I dare to post them here.

Feel free to post yours in response should you stumble across my page but also let me know, if you will, if you have, in fact, been diagnosed with anything before.

Test #1

Link: Online Screening for Personality Disorders

Results:

Based on the above answer(s), your personality traits might be associated with following personality type(s):

• Schizoid Personality
• Schizotypal Personality
• Borderline Personality
• Obsessive Personality

Test #2

Link: Personality Disorder Test
Results:

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Personality Disorder:	High
Schizoid Personality Disorder:	Very High
Schizotypal Personality Disorder:	Very High
Antisocial Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Borderline Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Personality Disorder:	Low
Narcissistic Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Avoidant Personality Disorder:	High
Dependent Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	High
-- Take the Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Info --

"Psych groups' fury over 'ransom' ads" - not all attention is good

Yeah, these adds piss me off too. All they do is add to the stigma that we already have to deal with on a daily basis and promotes useless pity. In this case, I don't agree that negative attention is better than no attention. Here is the link: Unnecessary Negative publicity about Autism and ADHD.

"These "ransom notes" are being plastered all over town as part of a new ad campaign about the dangers of psychiatric disorders like autism, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder and Asperger's syndrome. They are causing outrage among many of the groups they are designed to represent - prompting parents and disability advocates to demand they be taken down. "The child has not been 'taken,' they just need a little extra help," said Melissa Ramirez, 26, who has a cousin with autism. "It's basically showing [parents] they have no control over their child. It's inappropriate." The ad campaign is being rolled out over the next four months by the NYU Child Study Center, which says the posters are designed to highlight the plight of children who suffer from undiagnosed or untreated psychiatric problems.
(This aspect I can agree with but there are better ways to get your point across. Being undiagnosed all of your life SUCKS! But people are not going to take it that way)"

"Disability advocates including Not Dead Yet and the Autism Acceptance Project have united in protest. "There needs to be recognition that not all attention is good attention," said Ari Ne'eman, president of the Autistic Self Advocacy Network who suffers from Asperger's syndrome. "The message that this campaign is sending, specifically that children with disabilities are shells, that somehow we have had our true selves stolen away or kidnapped ... is one that has a lot of terrible consequences."

25 October 2007 - Getting evaluated

I found a place.

I found it by accident while surfing the internet. A place that evaluates for asperger's, NVLD, and ADHD.
They evaluate both adults and children.
Unfortunately my insurance only covers the ADHD evaluation and very little of the Asperger's evaluation. I will have to wait until after I finish my degree and we are more stable.
I need to research this place and see if they are any good. I've had a bad experience in the past and I don't want to go through that again.

Waiting to find out.

I've been doing a lot of self reflection and research the past year and have been thinking that it is possible that I may fall on the spectrum. I hope to eventually know for sure and be able to make an official title to this blog and speak of my experiences as a parent and how I plan on doing the best damn job possible. My worse fear is that I will be told that I am mentally ill or just a hypochondriac and there is nothing wrong with me. (What will my title be? Crazy, neurotic mom?)

Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on your point of view) it is not that simple and I am positive that there is more to the picture. I have been on the outside my whole life and have never entirely been able to relate to another human. Becoming a mother has brought me a little bit closer but there still seems to be some invisible wall that I can't get past.

Recently I found a community of members who have Asperger's syndrome and Non Verbal Learning Disorder. I am leaning more towards the fact that I may have Non Verbal Learning Disorder but I can only do so much research and personal reflection without speaking to a professional.

I will close this entry for now. I have to go pick up my daughter from school and I also have a lot of homework that I need to take care of. (I'm a bit behind)

Take care all,


(-:

Article on ADD and Non Verbal Learning Disorder

Not only have I been doing research on Asperger's syndrome but I have also come across a condition called Non Verbal Learning Disorder which seems to be related or similar.
I have, in the past, been diagnosed with ADD. I always had the feeling that the diagnoses was not exactly correct.


~ Here is the link to the article (To my friends with ADD, this article is from a magazine called ADDitude. It's created especially for people with ADD/ADHD.):

Maybe It’s Not ADD After All

Here are a few highlights from the magazine:

Marci did well academically in grades one and two, although she didn't have many friends. Her third-grade teachers said she seemed inattentive in class, blurted out inappropriate comments, and bumped into classmates clumsily when they lined up for recess. Later that year, Marci was diagnosed with ADD. But Ritalin didn't help. Neither did Adderall.

Given her obvious intelligence, her teachers considered her C average evidence of laziness or defiance.

Nonverbal learning disorder (NLD) is a constellation of brain-based difficulties. Once considered rare, NLD is now thought to be as prevalent as dyslexia. Strongly genetic in origin, NLD affects girls as freqently as boys and is characterized by poor visual, spatial, and organizational skills, poor motor performance, and difficulty recognizing and processing nonverbal cues - body language, facial expression, and the nuances of conversation.

* Despite their facility with language, kids with NLD often have poor reading comprehension. A child with NLD may miss the forest and the trees because of his intense focus on the leaves. After reading a book about the Civil War, for instance, the child might be able to name and describe each battlefield - yet fail to recognize that the conflict was about slavery and federalism.

At first glance, children with NLD seem to behave like those with ADD, but the appropriate interventions are not the same. A child with NLD may have trouble sitting still and may bump into people. But this isn't due to hyperactivity - it's due to his poor balance and coordination, and trouble with visuospatial relationships.

NLD varies from child to child, and is not defined as a separate entity in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual. For diagnosis, a child must undergo neuropsychological testing, speech and language assessment, and educational and occupational therapy evaluations.

kids with NLD usually demonstrate a verbal I.Q. that's 20 or more points higher than their performance I.Q. (Verbal I.Q. is a measure of a child's language ability. Performance I.Q. measures how well he makes use of what he knows.) Another test, the Brown ADD Scales, can help differentiate NLD from ADD.