Talking to my dad

I have to talk to my dad but it has been told to me, by my mother, that I should not write him a letter on e-mail but, instead, it is best to speak with him on the phone. I don't like this. I have a very difficult time speaking compared to writing. I express myself one-hundred times better with a letter. I'm pretty sure my father is the same way. He also hates talking on the phone (Unless he is talking about computers or playing in his concerts (he's a musician)). This is not something my mother tends to understand but I do get her point and if I e-mail him I don't want everyone reading it.

Here's the issue:

Every year, during the holidays, my father sends us a couple of gift certificates for $250 each. This is more than what we need and we are in a serious financial bind. I want to ask him to send money instead but I just can't do it.
I do, at least, need to let him know that we are unable to visit them this holiday like they wanted because our situation keeps us from driving 5 hours up to ** to visit. We can't even go for drives because we have no money for gas and my husband's father is sending us down to ** on New Years so that we can see his Grandma whom has been getting very sick.

I know better not to listen to my mother when it comes to talking to my dad. She has it out for him and she is very bitter (I believe my father also has Aspergers syndrome which would explain A LOT) and she has always used us for revenge against my dad.

well, enough of this, blah blah blah. I've already decided to not ask my dad for money but I do at least need to let him know about our situation so that he doesn't think we are blowing him off.

I think I will write him AND talk to him on the phone and I will do both because;
1. He may be drunk and not remember the conversation
2. I've decided that I don't mind that his wife reads the e-mail
3. Telling him about my situation won't give him a HINT about my situation because my father doesn't get hints (nor do I give them. I'm pretty direct) but I think he will appreciate me not asking for money since my siblings frequently do and I don't want to be put in the same category.